I’ma hold your hand when I say this: Some of y’all straight Black women are acting real funny when it comes to the LGBTQIA+ community, and I’m tired.

I’m tired of the slick comments, the fake allyship, the “love the gays but…” attitude. I’m tired of people who look like me replicating the same homophobia and transphobia that we scream about when it’s directed at us.

Because let’s be for real — if your idea of Black liberation doesn’t include all Black people, then what you’re pushing ain’t liberation.

It’s ego. It’s individualism. It’s colonizer behavior in a party city wig.

There Is No Black Community Without All of Us

We as Black women are no strangers to oppression. We know what it feels like to be hated, underestimated, sexualized, ignored, and disrespected just for breathing. So please explain to me — how did we become the same type of people we can’t stand when it comes to our queer and trans fam?

You think you can build “community” while actively excluding people who’ve fought for our rights, marched beside us, defended us online and in real life, slayed our hair, beat our faces, styled our looks, inspired our movements, and shaped our culture?

Baby, that’s not community that’s entitlement.

There’s no such thing as partial solidarity. Either we fight for everyone, or we’re feeding the same system that’s trying to destroy us.

We’ve Inherited the Worst of American Individualism

Part of the problem? We’ve swallowed the lie of white, Western individualism. The idea that your struggle is more important than someone else’s. That proximity to power (read: cishet, male, “normal”) means you’re somehow above critique.

That’s white supremacy in a wig, and some of y’all are wearing it like it’s laid.

We don’t heal through exclusion. We don’t win through gatekeeping. The Black community is strongest when it’s rooted in collective care. And you cannot claim to care about Black liberation while making queer and trans Black people feel unsafe, disposable, or unseen.

Ts Madison: A cultural powerhouse and the first Black trans woman to both star in and executive produce her own reality series (The Ts Madison Experience). She’s a legendary force: activist, producer, podcaster, reality TV icon, and artist shaping the narrative and taking up space with unapologetic brilliance.

LGBTQIA+ & Trans Black Folks Have Shaped the Culture Y’all Live For

Let’s get even more real: From the way you talk, walk, dress, vote, party, post, and “serve looks” — you are standing on the shoulders of the LGBTQIA+ and trans Black community whether you admit it or not.

• No ballroom scene? No baddie aesthetic.
• No Black queer organizers? No civil rights wins.
• No Black trans femmes? No cultural edge, no slang, no TikTok trends.

We owe these communities everything and more.

The Hypocrisy Is Loud and Embarrassing

Black women are one of the most disrespected, undervalued, and mischaracterized groups on the planet. So why would you turn around and mirror the same violence onto queer and trans folks?

When you talk about being “threatened just for existing,” remember that your LGBTQIA+ brothers, sisters, and siblings are also walking targets. You cry out when you’re ignored, and then ignore someone else’s humanity?

Make it make sense.

This “treat me right while I treat others like trash” attitude is colonizer logic. And it has no place in our community if we’re serious about freedom.

The Bottom Line: Be Better

You don’t have to fully understand someone’s life to treat them with respect. You don’t have to relate to show up. You just have to be decent.

Being kind costs nothing.
But being complicit in oppression? That costs lives.

If you’re a straight Black woman and you’ve ever called yourself pro-Black, then act like it. Love our queer family. Protect our trans siblings. Uplift every voice. And stop perpetuating the same hierarchies we’ve spent generations trying to burn down.

You can’t fight for your own freedom while holding the whip behind your back.

Fix yourself.